How to be happy: you must not marry for advantage, you must marry for love

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YOU MUST NOT MARRY FOR ADVANTAGE, YOU MUST MARRY FOR LOVE”. These were the dying last words of Prince Kit’s father to his son (Prince Kit) in the movie Cinderella. Prince’s Kit’s father advised his Prince Kit to follow his heart in the choice of a princess to marry.

And maybe I should add: don’t marry until you find love.

Cinderella on IMDB:


Some people say: “ True love cannot be found”. They are correct because just as Torquato Tasso says: “True love cannot be found where it does not exist, nor can it be denied where it does”.

Love is born when a man loves himself; love is born when a woman loves herself. If those who say true love cannot be found would just give birth to love in themselves, they would find love in others. ‘He cannot love another who cannot love himself; he can’t feel loved by another who cannot give love to himself’. First, the love of self has to exist before the love for another can happen.

Some other people say that “True love abounds everywhere”. They are correct too. True love abounds everywhere, and it is because such people have given birth to a lot of love in all aspects of their individual lives, that they find it(love) everywhere. Thus they even feel loved before actually receiving love from others.


Two or three decades ago, single parenthood was a taboo. A child growing up with only 1(one) birth parent was a result of extreme unavoidable circumstances or even tragedy to the other parent. It was a situation nobody wished or prayed for. In marriage ceremonies here in Africa, the bride and groom pray for many happy years together as husband and wife, for a major purpose of bringing up their children together.

Fast forward to today, there are a lot of unwed fathers and mothers everywhere. Most obvious in the society is the single mother who could either be divorced, separated or unwed. The father of the child is either partially involved, willfully absent or absolutely non-existent in the upbringing of the child. When such a child becomes a teenager / young adult, he/she begins to manifest signs of a delinquent juvenile. The child is so soon blamed, but we forget he/she might not have had a father/mother figure as a positive role-model to look up too while growing up.

Nowadays, it is all about prenuptial agreements because we don’t believe love alone is sufficient to see the marriage contract through from the start till death do us part.


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